Marriage to Relatives or Non-Relatives Preferred?

One of my relatives has come to me for the purpose of marriage but I heard to marry from non-relatives is preferred for the sake of the future of the children and other reasons. What is your opinion on this matter?

پاسخ: The principle has been stated by a number of scholars. It points to the fact that genetics and heredity has an effect. There is no doubt that genetics has an effect on the physical and psychological make-up of a person.

This is shown in the hadith where a man came to the Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ‘alaihi-wasallam) and said, “My wife has given birth to a black child.” (He was opposing that child as all of his ascendants were of light skin).

رسول الله (sallallaahu ‘alaihi-wasallam) به او گفت, “Do you own camels?” او گفت, “Yes.” پیامبر (sallallaahu ‘alaihi-wasallam) گفت, “What colour are they?” او گفت, “Red.” پیامبر (sallallaahu ‘alaihi-wasallam) asked him, “Is there a dusky one among them ?” او گفت, “Yes.” پیامبر (sallallaahu ‘alaihi-wasallam) then said , “How has that come about?” The man replied , “It is perhaps due to the strain to which it has reverted.” So the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi-wasallam) به او گفت, “Perhaps that son of yours is due to the strain to which it is reverted.” [1]

This is evidence that genetics does have an effect and there is no doubt about it. با این حال, پیامبر (sallallaahu ‘alaihi-wasallam) also said,

“A women is married for [any of] four reasons: for her wealth, for her lineage, for her beauty or for her religion. So try to marry one who is religious, may your hands be smeared with dust.” [2]

از این رو, the most important matter in proposing to a women is her piety. The more religious she is and the more beautiful she is then the better she is, regardless if she be a close relative or distant [non-] relative.

The religious women will protect the man’s wealth, فرزندان, and house. Beauty fulfils his needs and lowers his gaze and he will not look to others. و خداوند داناتر است.

[1] Recorded by al-Bukhari and Muslim.

[2] Recorded by al-Bukhari and Muslim.

Shaykh Muhammad bin Saalih al-`Uthaymeen

Islamic Fatawa Regarding Women – Darussalam Pg.187-188.