Kaʻana like i kēia
Excerpts from :http://news.yahoo.com/cant-buy-love-materialism-kills-marriages-161433917.html
http://www.themuslimtimes.org/2011/10/religion/islam/cant-buy-love-materialism-kills-marriages-islam-could-help
http://www.soundvision.com/Info/Islam/marriage.ideal.asp
Focusing too heavily on the “for richer” part of the nuptial vows could spell disaster for a marriage, according to research published today by Brigham Young University.
In a survey of 1,700 married couples, researchers found that couples in which one or both partners placed a high priority on getting or spending money were much less likely to have satisfying and stable marriages.
“Our study found that materialism was associated with spouses having lower levels of responsiveness and less emotional maturity. Materialism was also linked to less effective communication, higher levels of negative conflict, lower relationship satisfaction, and less marriage stability,” said Jason Carroll, a BYU professor of family life in Provo, Utah, and lead author of the study.
Researchers gauged materialism using self-report surveys that asked questions such as to what extent do you agree with these statements? “I like to own things to impress people” a i ʻole “money can buy happiness.” Spouses were then surveyed on aspects of their marriage.
For one out of every five couples in the study, both partners admitted a strong love of money. These couples were worse off in terms of marriage stability, marriage satisfaction, communications skills and other metrics of healthy matrimony that researchers studied.
The one out of seven couples that reported low-levels of materialism in both partners scored 10 i 15 percent higher in all metrics of marital quality and satisfaction. ʻO ka hoihoi, the correlation between materialism and marital difficulties remained stable regardless of the actual wealth of the couple.
O ye people! be mindful of your duty to your Lord, Who created you from a single soul and created therefrom its mate, and from them twain spread many men and women; and fear Allah, in Whose name you appeal to one another, and fear Him particularly respecting ties of relationship. ʻOiaʻiʻo, Allah watches over you. (Al Quran 4:2)
Wrong Concept of an Ideal Husband
A look at the matrimonial section of an Islamic magazine will quickly demonstrate that many Muslim men and women do not know what an ideal Muslim husband is. Muslim men looking for wives advertise themselves as doctors, engineers, and financially secure. Muslim women appear to be on the lookout for an established professional or more likely a handsome MD. Rarely do Muslim men and women even mention character, religious convictions, and attitudes as a priority. At most, they might be mentioned as a sidebar. It seems that many of us believe that a man is an ideal Muslim husband if he is handsome, makes a lot of money, and comes from an influential family. And the divorce rate among Muslims continues to rise.
There Are Things That Money Just Can’t Buy
Be sincere in your relationships. Don’t run after money,fame,physical appearances or any other materialisms. The Ideal Muslim Partner should be humble, gentle, ʻano ʻano, considerate, mālama, aloha, open to good advice, willing to cooperate with others in the family rather than dictate rules, helpful in the house, involved in raising the children, and never abusive either physically or mentally.
Try to explore your happiness, your pleasures, inner peace and ignore this materialistic world. One can never feel so comfortable in a home full of love and care than a house full of material, he paradaiso pau ole, gold, diamond and electronics.
Kaula Mahometa (sallallahu alayhi was sallam) i ʻōlelo ai, “A woman is normally sought as a wife for her wealth, nani, nobility, or religiousness (adherence to Islam), but choose a religious woman and you will prosper. ” (Mahometa) I mai la ia, “A woman is married for four things, ʻo ia hoʻi., her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. You should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a loser. “(Bukhari) I mai la ia, “The whole world is a provision, and the best object of benefit of the world is the pious woman. ” (Mahometa)
The same holds true when looking for a husband, as the Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi was sallam) i ʻōlelo ai, “When someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied asks to marry your daughter, comply with his request. If you do not do so, there will be corruption and great evil on earth. ” (Tirmidhi)
Do not marry women for their beauties; it is possible that their beauties cause them to become morally corrupt. Do not marry them for their wealth because their wealth may cause them to go astray. Marry women because of their piety. There is no doubt that a woman whose cloth is torn is superior to women who are better. (Ibn Majah |)
Finding out the true emotions and relations is far way important than bagging the materialistic pleasures.
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Excerpts from :http://news.yahoo.com/cant-buy-love-materialism-kills-marriages-161433917.html
http://www.themuslimtimes.org/2011/10/religion/islam/cant-buy-love-materialism-kills-marriages-islam-could-help
http://www.soundvision.com/Info/Islam/marriage.ideal.asp
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