Kāohi ʻana i ka pilina o ke Kaikamahine-kākā kāne

'ē aʻe (moe kolohe) ua lilo i mea maʻamau i loko o ke kaiāulu Muslim Youth, a ua haule kaumaha na kaikamahine a me na kane kane Mahometa i na pahele o ka nohona Komohana. Hiki paha iā ʻoe ke noʻonoʻo pehea e hiki ai ke ʻano o kēia ʻano i ka wā e waiho ai ka hapa nui o nā mākua Muslim i kā lākou mau keiki ma lalo o ka 'loka a me ke kī'.. ʻO ka pane, ʻoiai ʻo ka hapa nui o nā mākua i koʻikoʻi ma kahi o kā lākou mau keiki, ʻAʻole lākou e lawe i ka manawa e kamaʻilio a wehewehe iā lākou e pili ana i ke koʻikoʻi o Zina. aka, haawi lakou i Fatwa o “ʻaʻohe hoa kāne” i ka wā o kā lākou mau kaikamāhine. ʻO ia hana e like me ke kauoha ʻana i kahi keiki ʻelua makahiki ʻaʻole e hoʻopā i ka mana mana. He aha kou manaʻo e hana ai ke keiki?

Hōʻike ka ʻatikala ma hope i nā ala e hiki ai iā mākou ke aʻo i kā mākou mau keiki e haʻalele i kēia hana ʻino.

Ma Islam, ʻaʻohe mea e like me ka pilina pili i ka ipo. Ua male ʻoe a ʻaʻole paha. ʻO kēia ka mea a mākou e hoʻokomo ai i kā mākou mau keiki i ka wā mua. ʻAʻole mākou e kali iā lākou e hele mai iā mākou i ko lākou wā ʻōpio e nīnau e pili ana i ka pilina o ka hoaaloha a me ke kāne. I kēia pae hope, ʻoiai inā pāpā mākou iā lākou ʻaʻole loaʻa kahi pilina, Pehea ko makou manao, e hoolohe lakou ia makou ke hahau ia lakou e kekahi? No laila, He mea nui ia e aʻo aku i kā mākou mau keiki ʻo ka manawa wale nō e hiki ai i ke kaikamahine a i ʻole ke keikikāne ke loaʻa ka pilina me ka mea ʻole ʻo Mahatma. (ʻo non-Mahatma kekahi mea hiki iā lākou ke mare) ʻo ia ke male ʻana! Eia kekahi, inā komo kekahi kaikamahine a keikikāne paha i ka pilina o ka hoaaloha a me ke kāne kāne a laila ke komo nei ʻo ia i kahi pilina ma mua o ka male..

I ka pae ʻōpio, ʻAʻole pono mākou e hilahila e aʻo iā lākou i ka paʻakikī o ka pilina ma mua o ka male. Pono mākou e hoʻomaopopo iā lākou ʻo ka pilina ma mua o ka male ʻana e like me nā pilina keu, a i ʻole ka mea i ʻike maʻamau ʻia ʻo ka moekolohe a i ʻole ka 'affair'. Hoʻopilikia ia i ke kaiāulu ma ka hana ʻino ʻana i nā kānaka. Hoʻopuka ia i nā makemake kumu, hoʻokahi manawa i ʻae ʻia i ke aupuni kūʻokoʻa, e luku ana i na ohana. Hiki iā mākou ke haʻi aku iā lākou i nā hiʻohiʻona o nā keiki pono ʻole a haʻalele, na hale wawahi, hoʻopaʻa keiki, a me na ma'i moe kolohe – hele ka papa inoa. Pono mākou e kuhikuhi iā lākou i ka hoʻopaʻi no ka pilina ma waho o ka male: Ibn Masoud (r.a.a) pili i ke kaula Muhammad (s.a.w) i ʻōlelo ai, “ʻAʻole hiki ke hoʻokahe ʻia ke koko o kahi Muslim ma ke kānāwai ʻē aʻe ma kahi o ʻekolu mau manawa: ke kanaka mare i moe kolohe, he ola no ke ola, a o ka mea haalele i kona hoomana a haalele i ke kaiaulu.” [Bukhari a me Muslim]. ʻO ia hoʻi, o ke kanaka mare i moe kolohe, e pepehiia oia me ka hailuku a make [Mahometa]. Akā, pehea ka mea i mare ʻole ʻia e pili ana i ka moekolohe? E ʻoluʻolu ʻaʻole e hoʻopaʻi ʻia kēia kanaka – e hahau ʻia ʻo ia i hoʻokahi haneri manawa [Mahometa]. ʻOiai ma kēia hope aku, koʻikoʻi ka hoʻopaʻi: ke Kaula (s.a.w) ike i ka poe moe kolohe, nā kāne a me nā wahine, i loko o ka umu kālua i ke ahi o Gehena [Bukhari].

I kēia wā e ʻōlelo paha kāu keiki ʻōpio ʻaʻole pono ka pilina o ka hoaaloha a me ke kāne kāne; hiki iā lākou ke hoʻomalu iā lākou iho a leʻaleʻa wale i kēlā me kēia hui. E kūʻē i kēia, ʻōlelo ʻoe he mea ʻoiaʻiʻo ke noho hoʻokahi ke kaikamahine a me ke keikikāne, ua ala mai ko lakou makemake moe kolohe a mamua o ko lakou ike ana, e hana lākou i nā mea i ʻae ʻole ʻia ma waena o ka poʻe male ʻole. ʻO ke kumu o kēia no ka mea ʻo Shaytaan ke kolu o ka mea me lākou [Ahmad] a e hawanawana a hoowalewale oia ia lakou me ka mea i papaia. ʻO kēia ke kumu e haʻalele ai ʻo Islam i nā ala āpau e alakaʻi ai i ka palaho o ka noʻonoʻo, kino a me ka uhane.

ʻO kekahi mea ʻē aʻe a mākou e aʻo ai iā lākou, ʻo ia ke kāohi i ko lākou makemake. Hiki iā mākou ke hana pēlā ma ka hāʻawi ʻana iā lākou i nā hiʻohiʻona o nā uku no ka hana ʻana pēlā, e like me ka mea e hoomalu ana i kona kuko, aia no ia iwaena o na kanaka a ke Akua i haawi mai ai i ke aloha:

ʻO Abu Hurairah (r.a.a) ua hai mai o Kaula Mahometa (s.a.w) 'ōlelo 'o ia ma waena o nā kānaka 'ehiku a ke Akua e malu ai ma kona malu i ka lā (o ka Hookolokolo) i ka wā ʻaʻohe malu o kona malu wale nō, he kanaka i hoowalewaleia e ka wahine u'i a hoole i ka pane no ka makau ia Allah. [Bukhari a me Muslim].

Aia ma lalo iho nā ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo no ke kōkua ʻana i kāu keiki, i ka wā kamaliʻi, e noho maʻemaʻe i kona wā ʻelemakule, hiki iā ia ke pale i ke komo ʻana i ka pilina o ka hoaaloha a me ke kāne. Ka mua, pono ʻoe e kamaʻilio a wehewehe iā lākou i kēia mau mea i ko lākou wā ʻōpiopio, a laila i ko lākou wā ʻelemakule, e hōʻoia ʻoe e hoʻokō ʻia.

Pono ʻoe e aʻo iā ia:

1. ʻAʻole e hui wale me ke kāne ʻē.

2. ʻAʻole e nānā i ke kāne ʻē. Hana ʻia kēia ma ka hoʻohaʻahaʻa ʻana a i ʻole ka pale ʻana i ko lākou mau maka e like me kā Allah e ʻōlelo mai ai iā mākou: “E haʻi aku i nā kāne manaʻoʻiʻo e hoʻohaʻahaʻa i ko lākou mau maka a mālama i ko lākou mau wahi huna. ʻOi aku ka maʻemaʻe no lākou. ʻOiaʻiʻo, ua ʻike ʻo Allah i kā lākou hana. A e haʻi aku i nā wahine manaʻoʻiʻo e hoʻohaʻahaʻa i ko lākou maka a pale i ko lākou mau wahi pilikino…” [24:30-31] Eia kekahi, Kaula Mahometa (s.a.w) i ʻōlelo ai, “…Mai hoʻokuʻu i ka nānā lua ma hope o ka mua. ʻAe ʻia ka nānā mua iā ʻoe akā ʻaʻole ka lua.” [Ahmad, ʻO Abu Dawood, at-Tirmidhi]. ʻO ke ʻano o kēia, ʻo ka nānā mua ʻana ma ka pōʻino. Inā loaʻa kēia, mai nānā ʻelua. Kaula Mahometa (s.a.w) Ua olelo no hoi, ua moe kolohe na maka ma ka nana aku i ke kuko. [Bukhari]

3. No na kaikamahine, e aʻo iā lākou ʻaʻole e hoʻowalewale i ko lākou leo ​​i mua o ka Mahram ʻole. Hana ʻia kēia ma ka hoʻohaʻahaʻa ʻana i ka leo a ʻaʻole hoʻohuoi. E like me ka olelo a ke Akua i na wahine a ke kaula Muhammad (s.a.w) “…mai hooluolu i ka olelo, o manao mai ka ma'i iloko o kona naau…” [33:32]

4. ʻo ka mea hope akā naʻe ʻaʻole hoʻi ka mea liʻiliʻi, e aʻo iā lākou e ʻaʻahu i nā lole kūpono i ʻole e huki i ka manaʻo iā lākou iho. ʻo ia, Pono nā kaikamāhine e komo i nā Hijab a me nā lole ʻaʻahu ʻaʻole pono nā keikikāne e ʻaʻahu i nā lole ʻokoʻa, ʻaʻole nā ​​jeans paʻa a i ʻole nā ​​pants me ka T-shirt i hoʻopaʻa ʻia i loko. He mea kaumaha kēlā, pinepine, ʻAe nā mākua i kā lākou mau keiki e ʻaʻahu i ka lole i kapa ʻia, i ka nui o na hihia, ʻaʻole e hoʻokō i ke koi o ke kāʻei lole Islamic ʻae ʻia. ʻO ka mea kaumaha loa ka ʻike ʻana i nā makuahine Muslim e uhi pono ana iā lākou iho e hele pono ana me kā lākou mau kaikamahine ʻōpio a me kā lākou mau keikikāne i uhi ʻole ʻia..

5. He mea nui e hoʻomaka mākou e aʻo i kā mākou mau keiki i ka pono o ka manaʻo haʻahaʻa, ʻoi aku ka pili o ke kāne. E pili ana i ka hilahila, e hoohana kakou i ke kaula (s.a.w) i laʻana: ʻO Abu Said Al Khudri (r.a.a) hoike mai ke Kaula (s.a.w) ʻoi aku ka hilahila ma mua o ka wahine puʻupaʻa i loko o kona lumi ponoʻī. [Bukhari] Inā mākou e hoʻokomo i kēia i loko o lākou i ka wā kamaliʻi, Insha’ Akua, i nā manawa a pau e kokoke ana lākou i kahi pili o ke kāne, hilahila lākou a, nolaila, ʻaʻole e hana kūpono ʻole. He mea nui nō hoʻi e wehe mākou i nā ala kamaʻilio me kā mākou mau keiki i hiki iā mākou ke kamaʻilio a wehewehe iā lākou i nā mea, a hiki iā lākou ke nīnau iā mākou i nā nīnau, me ka hilahila ole. A laila, i ko lakou nui ana, a me ke kōkua mai iā mākou, E hoʻomaka ana lākou e hoʻomaopopo i ke kumu ʻaʻole hiki ke loaʻa kahi mea i kapa ʻia ʻo ka pilina pili i ka hoaaloha a me ke kāne..

He aha ka mea i alakaʻi i kēia?

Nui nā kumu e ʻimi ai nā kaikamāhine i nā keikikāne. ʻO ka mea hewa mua a nā mākua e kuhikuhi ai i ka manamana lima hoʻopiʻi, ʻo ia nā hormones huhū o ke kaikamahine. He ʻoiaʻiʻo paha kēia i kekahi mau kaikamahine akā ʻaʻole i nā mea āpau. Aia kekahi mau kaikamahine i loaʻa i nā hormones huhū akā hiki iā lākou ke hoʻomalu iā lākou iho, a laila aia kekahi mau kaikamahine ʻaʻole i loaʻa nā hormones huhū akā e ʻimi mau nei i ka wahine ʻē.

No laila, he aha nā kumu ʻē aʻe o ke ʻano o ke kaikamahine?

ʻO ka hoʻoikaika o nā hoa kekahi. I ka loaʻa ʻana o kāna mau hoa a me nā hoa kula āpau i mau hoaaloha, manaʻo ʻo ia e koi ʻia e hahai. Inā ʻaʻohe kāna kāne kāne ponoʻī a laila manaʻo ʻo ia ua haʻalele ʻo ia no ka mea ʻaʻole hiki iā ia ke komo pū me kā lākou mau hana ma hope o ke kula a ʻaʻole hiki iā ia ke komo i kā lākou kamaʻilio ʻana.. ʻO ka mea ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi o ka ʻike ʻana o nā mea a pau iā ia ma ke ʻano he “kukini”.

ʻO kekahi kumu ʻē aʻe inā e hana ana ʻo ia i ka hoʻokūkū kaulana. Hoʻokūkū ʻo ia me nā kaikamahine ʻē aʻe i ka loaʻa ʻana o nā hoaaloha he nui e hiki iā ia ke ʻike ʻo wai ka mōʻī wahine kaulana.. Hoʻopuka pū ʻia kēia mau hoʻokūkū no ka mea ua ʻike ʻia he mau keikikāne kaulana wale nō. Hoʻokomo pinepine ʻia ka luhi i kahi kaikamahine i nā lima o kahi keikikāne. ʻIke ʻo ia i kona ola he monotonous a no laila ʻimi ʻo ia i ka hauʻoli a me ka hauʻoli me ke keikikāne. A i ʻole he haʻahaʻa kona manaʻo ponoʻī, no laila ke hilinaʻi nei ʻo ia iā ia i mea e makemake ai a makemake ʻia.

ʻO kekahi kumu ʻē aʻe he pono ke aloha ʻia ʻo ia. ʻImi ʻo ia i ke aloha o kona mau mākua akā ʻaʻole hiki iā ia ke komo, nolaila, ʻimi ʻo ia ma kahi ʻē. E like me kēia inā e ʻimi ana ʻo ia i kona mau mākua. Ua hōʻole ʻo ia iā lākou i ka ʻimi ʻana i hoa kāne i hiki iā ia ke nānā aku. ʻOi aku ka maikaʻi o ka nānā ʻana iā ia ma mua o ka nānā ʻole. ʻO ka ʻokoʻa ma waena o ka pono o ke aloha a me ka pono o ka nānā ʻana, ʻo ia ka mea hana mua. Inā ʻaʻole hiki iā ia ke loaʻa mai kona mau mākua mai, hele ʻo ia ma kahi ʻē. ʻOiai ke koi nei ka hope i kona mau mākua. Hiki i nā kumu ʻē aʻe a i ʻole nā ​​kumu i hui pū ʻia i luna. Eia naʻe, he aha ke kumu a me ke kumu paha, pono nā mākua e ʻike a hoʻomaopopo. ʻOi aku ka maʻalahi o kēia ma mua o ka mea i manaʻo ʻia e nā mākua ke hoʻoulu i kā lākou mau kaikamahine e hoʻopili.

Pehea e hoʻokokoke aku ai iā lākou?

Ke kamaʻilio nā mākua, pono e malama i ole e lilo i accusative (“Ua hana ʻoe i kēia…”) a hoʻohewa (“Pela oe…”), a i ʻole, e pau ia me he nīnau makai (“No ke aha ʻoe…?”). Hoʻohui wale kēia i ka hōʻole ʻana o kā lāua kaikamahine. Eia kekahi, e mālama pono i kona manaʻo ponoʻī, pale i ka hoʻohana ʻana “pono”, “mai hana” a me nā ʻōlelo ʻino ʻē aʻe a pau. ʻO ke kamaʻilio maikaʻi ʻana, ʻo ia hoʻi ka ʻike i ka wā e hoʻolohe ai. ʻAʻole wale ka lohe ʻana akā ka hoʻomaopopo ʻana. E hoʻomaopopo i ka mea i ʻōlelo ʻia, pono na makua e akaka (“Ke manaʻo nei ʻoe…?”), e hooiaio mai (“Manaʻo ʻoe… no ka mea…”) a e hoʻohālua iā ia (“Kani maoli ʻoe…”). Ke manaʻo ka ʻōpio ua hoʻomaopopo kona mau mākua iā ia, e paipai ʻia ʻo ia e haʻi iā lākou a wehewehe i ke kumu o kāna hana ʻana i nā mea a me kona manaʻo no ia mea. A e like me kaʻu i ʻōlelo ai ma mua, ma ka hoomaopopo ana, E kiʻi nā mākua i ke kiʻi piha a laila e ʻike i ka hana kūpono e hana ai. Eia kekahi, inā makemake nā mākua e hoʻolohe ʻia e kā lākou mau keiki, pono lākou e hoʻohālike i nā mākau hoʻolohe maikaʻi. Hana nā keiki e like me ka hana a nā mākua ma mua o ka ʻōlelo a nā mākua. No laila ʻo kēia ka manawa maikaʻi e hoʻomaka ai e hoʻomaʻamaʻa i kēia mau mākau.

Ka palekana

Ke nānā pono nei i nā kumu i luna, E ʻike nā mākua ʻo ke kumu kumu o ka manaʻo ʻole o ke kaikamahine iā ia iho. He haʻahaʻa kona manaʻo ponoʻī a no laila ke hilinaʻi nei ʻo ia i ke keikikāne e hōʻoluʻolu iā ia iho. ʻO ke aʻa o ka hāʻule ʻana i loko o ka pahele o ka hoʻoikaika ʻana o nā hoa, nā hoʻokūkū kaulana, ka pono e makemake ʻia a aloha ʻia, a e noonoo, he pilikia ʻole. Inā ʻo ia ka hihia a laila e hāʻawi iā ia i ke aloha a me ka manaʻo e pono ai. E hōʻike a haʻi iā ia he aloha ʻoe iā ia ʻoiai ʻo ia “ino” nā hana, ʻaʻole naʻe ʻoe e ʻae iā lākou. E aʻo iā ia pehea e manaʻo maikaʻi ai iā ia iho a me kāna hoʻomana. E kūkulu i kona manaʻo ponoʻī ma ka hoʻomaopopo ʻana i kāna mau ʻano maikaʻi a me kāna mau hana a i ʻole kāna mau hoʻāʻo e hoʻokō. (a me ka nānā ʻole ʻana i nā hemahema). E hāʻawi i kāna mau hana paʻakikī a me nā hana hoʻoikaika. Pili no hoi keia i ke kaikamahine luuluu.

E lawe iā ia i nā hui ʻōpio Islam a me nā hoʻomoana. E paipai iā ia e hana i mau hoaaloha Muslim hou. ʻO ka mea me nā hormones huhū ʻaʻole hiki ke hoʻomalu iā ia iho, e nīnau iā ia inā makemake ʻo ia e mare (aka, mai hooikaika oe ia ia).

ʻOiaʻiʻo, e hoʻomanaʻo iā ia ʻo ka pilina o ka hoaaloha a me ke keikikāne ʻaʻole hiki ke ʻae ʻia a aʻo iā ia (hou) e pili ana i ke kūlana o Islam e pili ana i kēia. ʻO ka hope, hāʻawi i nā kumu hoʻohālike Muslim nona. Ua uku ʻia nā moʻolelo e pili ana i kēlā mau wahine i mālama i ko lākou maʻemaʻe a me ka haipule. Maryam, makuahine o Kaula Eesa (a.s), he laʻana nui.

Mai poina e pili ana i nā keikikāne

I ka malama ana i ke kaikamahine, I kēia manawa, e nānā au i ke keiki. He mea hoʻohenehene ka hana ʻana o nā mākua me he mea lā he make i loko o ka ʻohana i ka wā e komo ai kā lāua kaikamahine i ka pilina o ka hoaaloha a me ke keikikāne.. Akā inā ʻo ke keiki ke kūlana like a ʻoi aku paha ka hewa, ʻO nā mākua hoʻokahi ua hauʻoli,. manaʻo e loaʻa i ke keikikāne ka ʻike a hauʻoli mua iā ia iho ma mua o kona noho ʻana a male. Me he mea lā ʻo ke kaikamahine wale nō ke lawe i ka hanohano o ka ʻohana.

Pono e māhele like ʻia ka hanohano ma waena o ka ʻohana inā e mālama mau ʻia. ʻO ia hoʻi ka makua kāne, makuahine, Pono ke keiki kāne a me ke kaikamahine e mālama i ko lākou hanohano iho. Inā nalowale ka makua kāne a makuahine paha i kona hanohano a laila hāʻawi lākou i kumu hoʻohālike no kā lākou mau keiki. A inā e nalowale ke keiki kāne i kona hanohano a hala ʻole ka hoʻopaʻi ʻia, a laila e ʻike ke kaikamahine he hana hoʻokamani kēia a no laila ua kipi.. No kekahi hana uwao e hana i ke kaikamahine, Pono nā mākua e mālama i kā lākou keiki. E nānā i nā kumu e hahai ai nā kaikamāhine i nā keikikāne a laila e ʻike nā mākua ʻo ia nā mea e hoʻolalelale i nā keikikāne i nā lima o nā kaikamahine..

Puna: e ʻoluʻolu