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Istri-istri Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) sering kali dipahami sebagai contoh yang harus diikuti oleh wanita Muslim. Ketika perempuan Muslim diberi model penampilan, mereka akan berpaling kepada perempuan tersebut untuk menunjukkan kesalehan, ketabahan, kejujuran dan ketaatan. Namun apa yang tampaknya terlupakan di antara banyak orang adalah bahwa sebagian besar ibu-ibu yang beriman saat ini didefinisikan sebagai tidak subur. Di antara wanita-wanita ini ada dua orang yang diklasifikasikan mengalami infertilitas sekunder, keduanya memiliki anak sebelum menikah dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam). Semua yang lain tidak mempunyai anak sama sekali. Mari kita lihat para wanita ini.

Sawadaa': Dia menikah dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) tak lama setelah kematian Khadijah, tiga tahun sebelum hijrah (migrasi). Dia adalah seorang janda yang pernah menikah satu kali sebelumnya. Ada laporan yang saling bertentangan sehubungan dengan dia memiliki anak. Mereka yang menyatakan bahwa dia mempunyai seorang anak mengaitkan satu anak laki-laki kepadanya. Dia tidak melahirkan anak saat menikah dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam).

'Aa'ishah: Dia menikah dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) pada tahun yang sama dengan Sawdaa', meskipun pernikahannya baru dilangsungkan setelah hijrah ke Madinah. Dia adalah istri bungsu Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) dan satu-satunya perawan. Dia tidak melahirkan anak dalam pernikahannya.

Hafsah:
Dia menikah dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) setelah menjadi janda pada saat perang Badar. Dia dikatakan berusia sekitar sembilan belas tahun pada saat itu. Dia tidak memiliki anak dalam pernikahan pertamanya dengan Khumays b. Hudhafah dan dia tidak mempunyai anak dalam pernikahannya dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam).

Ummu Salamah: Dia menikah dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) di tahun 4 AH. Dia sebelumnya menikah dengan 'Abdullah ibn Abdul Asad dan mereka memiliki empat anak bersama, Zainab, Halo, Umar dan Durra. Dia menikah dengan Muhammad setelah menjadi janda dan masih menyusui Zaynab. Dia tidak melahirkan anak dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam).

Zaynab binti Jahsh: Dia adalah sepupu Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) dan sebelumnya menikah dengan anak angkatnya Zayd bin Thabit. Setelah Zayd menceraikannya pada tahun 5AH dia menikah dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) dengan ketetapan Allah. Dia tidak melahirkan anak di kedua pernikahan tersebut.

Juwariyyah
: Dia menikah dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) setelah Pertempuran Parit di 5 AH. Dia ditangkap dan kemudian dibebaskan oleh Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam); dia kemudian masuk Islam dan menikah dengan Nabi (damai dan berkah Allah, yang Perkasa, menimpanya). Dia sebelumnya menikah sebelum menjadi Muslim dengan Musafi’ bin Safwan. Dia tidak melahirkan anak di kedua pernikahan tersebut.

Ummu Habibah: Dia menikah dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) di tahun 7 AH. Dia sebelumnya menikah dengan 'Ubaydullah ibn Jahsh yang murtad setelah hijrah ke Abyssinia. Dia melahirkan seorang anak perempuan, Habibah setelah hijrah ke Abyssinia. Dia tidak melahirkan anak dalam pernikahannya dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam).

Safiyyah: Dia adalah seorang Yahudi dan ditangkap selama penyerangan terhadap Khaybar di 7 AH. Dia dibebaskan dan masuk Islam kemudian menikah dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam). Dia menikah dua kali sebelum pindah agama, dia tidak memiliki anak dalam pernikahan apa pun.

Maymoonah: Dia menikah dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) di 7AH. Dia adalah orang terakhir yang dinikahi oleh Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam). Dia sebelumnya menikah dengan Ma'sood ibn 'Amr ath-Thaqafi dan Abu Ruhm ibn 'Abdul Uzza. Dia tidak melahirkan anak dalam pernikahan apa pun.

Kita bisa berasumsi bahwa masalah kesuburan tidak terletak pada Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam). Ia memiliki anak dari istri pertamanya Khadijah, empat perempuan dan dua laki-laki. Dan dia punya satu anak, Ibrahim, dengan Maryam, budak Koptik yang diberikan kepadanya sebagai hadiah setelahnya 7 AH.

Ketika kita menganggap perempuan-perempuan ini sebagai contoh perempuan yang patut dicontoh, sungguh aneh mengapa sebagian orang begitu menekankan kemampuan perempuan untuk menghasilkan keturunan dan justru membuatnya merasa seolah-olah dia telah gagal jika dia tidak melakukannya.!! Di sini kita melihat kehidupan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) siapa yang paling baik memberi contoh, namun kami memiliki keinginan untuk mengukur nilai seorang wanita Muslim berdasarkan kemampuannya menghasilkan anak. Ya, contoh wanita Muslim ini tidak menghasilkan anak dalam pernikahan mereka dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam). Mereka (semoga Allah meridhoi mereka) dapat didefinisikan sebagai infertilitas berdasarkan definisi umum tentang infertilitas. Belum, Muhammad (semoga damai dan berkah Allah besertanya) tidak menceraikan mereka, dia juga tidak merendahkan mereka karena tidak mempunyai anak. Status mereka sebagai perempuan Muslim sama sekali tidak ditentukan oleh kemampuan atau ketidakmampuan mereka untuk memiliki anak. Kami tidak memiliki catatan bahwa hal ini menjadi masalah di antara para wanita ini, namun kita menjadikannya masalah di antara setiap pasangan meskipun kita tidak mengenal mereka.

Saya berharap semua saudara Muslim saya yang tidak subur dapat menemukan kekuatan dalam mengenang para wanita ini. Meskipun mereka tidak mempunyai anak dengan Muhammad (Shallallahu ‘alyhi wa sallam) dia mencintai dan menghormati mereka dan mereka diberi status tidak seperti wanita lain di umat kita (bangsa Islam).

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Sumber :http://idealmuslimah.com/family/infertility-miscarriages-birth-control/206-infertility-among-the-mothers-of-the-believers-

17 Komentar to Infertility Of The Mothers Of The Believers

  1. Bernadette

    Syukur! I really needed to read this as I was so depressed about this issue currently! This article brought tears of joy from tears of sadness for me! I am so much more happy and grateful because I can feel the pain beginning to leave me. Anda akan dimintai pertanggungjawaban!

    • May Allah bless you with His best of the best children. Adikku tersayang, after reading your comment, just the thought of how much pain you are in brought sadness to my heart. I’m happy that this topic eased your pain a little. I just wanted to say to never give up your hope. Allah is always listening to us and is always with us at all time. All we need to do is to go toward Him and ask Him. If He gives us what we want, it’s His blessing and if He doesn’t give us what we want then that means He has even better plan for us. Once I heard somewhere that Ali R.A. pernah berkata, ” when my dua is heard, I get happy, because I wanted that. And when my dua is not heard, then I get even happier, because this is what my God wanted.May Allah forgive me, if I’m wrong. I don’t have the exact words in english, but this is what I translated from urdu writing. I loved this saying, and it makes me very satisfied. May Allah keeps you happy, satisfied, successful and peaceful always! Here in this world and do the best for you in the Aakhira. Have a strong faith in Allah! I’m sure you do. That’s why your heart melted at this topic. bahwa dia juga menginginkan pria.

  2. khadeeza yasmin

    The pain I feel when people ask me why I don’t have children, the verbal abuse I get from my husband, and the shame felt from myself within….. Jazakallah for this article. And like the above sister, it brought tears to my eyes and more love for islam and our beloved rasool (gergaji)

  3. Subhanallah…this article came at the right time as I am also facing the same issue as the ladies here..People keep asking me when will i have children but my reply is always ‘It is in God’s hands and not up to us to decide when’. I am thankful to Allah swt that I have a very understanding husband and family members who give me support for at least I still hv a place where I can lean on and confide..may Allah swt gives us the strength to face the challenges in our lives for Allah swt knows best..

  4. Khadeeza and Rashal, May Allah bless you guys with His Rehmat! amin! May you both get the most pious and the righteous children, amin. I’m feeling so bad just reading your comments, and you guys have to live it. Always keep you faith high in Allah. Don’t let anyone make you feel ashamed. Allah does everything for a reason. Whoever bad mouth you guys, they don’t know what they say is being written by their angels and is being reported to Allah and the worst part is that they’re hurting you. Semoga Allah membimbing kita semua, amin! May Allah opens theirs hearts and make them realize their mistakes and may they feel love for you, instead of hatered. amin! I’ll pray for all of you too, Insya'Allah. I hope you guys don’t mind me replying to your comments.

  5. Your sister in Islam

    Alhamdulillah……all Praise for Allah SWT, who has blessed me with loving & supporting husband and family. Its been about 11 years now since i’ve been facing questioning looks from people around, for not having kids………..nevertheless i’m so glad n satisfied that Allah SWT has blessed me with a chance to learn his book and know him better. If i have had kids, i would surely not be where i am today, doing what i am 🙂
    This article has yet again given me strength and motivation to carry on without feeling low, coz indeed Allah SWT knows what’s best for us.
    To all of my sisters here i would like to say…….do not loose hope, be consistent in your duas, ask Allah SWT for the best for yourselves & the best would come along….INSHA ALLAH.
    from this article we know for sure that being childless is not the end of this world, there’s alot to do other than that.
    May Allah SWT bless us all with the righteous child/children if that would benefit our DUNYA & AAKHIRAH…..AAMEEN 🙂

    • Asalaamualaikam sisters i too have been married for nearly 9 years and still not a mother sadly but i enjoy spending time with my nieces gives me a bit of peace in my heart as i really want to be a mother. I would love to adopt but my husband wants to wait till we have our own 🙁 . I just make dua that one day i will be a mother thats all i want even if adopted please make Dua for me i feel so alone sometimes but i know im not Allah kareem is with me. I hope all you feel better soon this article helped me a lot.
      Jazak Allah Kher

  6. Naveen Malik

    Asslam u alaikum wr wb
    May ALLAH Bless you for your beautiful perspective and May He enhance it for you. amin. Jazakillah khair- even though I have been blessed with 2 anak-anak, it is amazing to see what erroneous concepts we have regarding our own worth. Or worth is as the slave of ALLAH no more and no less- if we fail to live upto that part, that is the problem,

  7. Salam pembuka, just wanted to raise an error in the article. Mispelling of one of the ummul mu’mineen names- Maariyah Qibtiyyah (Maria the Copt) not Maryam.

  8. As Salam Alai kum,

    I m in 36 tahun.
    I m not even married, looking out for marriage proposals, And being reminded by the chances of Infertily by my Mother, and she would ask me to marry a person who is already married and do hve children.

    Would tat be solution

    JazakAllah Khairan.

  9. I never knew this , its a new and inspiring addition of knowledge,,,it is happening to me even though I am only married for one year but I always feel guilty for not having a child,even now I can’t stand looking at a child and a mother together,,i feel that I am not worth a wife but now reading this new information I know I am not the only person,,,i pray for Allah every day to give me sabr and expecally my husband who even though he scared of hurting my feeling I still feel ,he is loosing the love he has for me. I pray for Allah also for the other sisters to get children.

  10. Had almost lost hope

    JazakAllahkhair for this wonderful article sister! The number of infertilile cases has increased at an alarming rate thanks to our lifestyle and food habits..As for me,been trying for over 4 years now and been suffering from mental stress and depression..the treatment does have certain effects on the mind and body,after all its hormones..
    .Even before I read this aricle i would console myself thinking of these greatest women in Islam especially Ayesha..maybe my Iman isn’t strong enough,i just keep losing faith again and again..Inspite of being blessed with a loving husband and an understanding family I do end up feeling worthless as a woman in the end..I dont grieve for myself, but for my dear husband because he is so patient..
    i have decided to strive in the name of Allah and now am concentrating on Islamic classes and reading..I do lose track ,but then something or the other happens to help me pick up..
    Insha Allah if it is in my naseeb I pray for a pious and saalih offspring..

  11. Assalaamu’Alaykum Wa Rahmatullaahi Wa Baraktuhu Sister,

    Jazaki’Allaahu’Khayr for this article. These past few months I have been battling with the effects of Leukemia and Lukopenia the chances of becoming pregnant are increasingly lower now. I was married once before and had a son, Namun, being divorced and remarried to a man that doesn’t have children,I have been praying so much to have a baby.

    Ironisnya, I am the one being hard on myself about not being able to have children. My husband comes from a huge family and most of siblings who are married have at least three children.

    Masha’Allaah, I am so grateful that my new husband has taken to my son and decided to raise him as his own, Namun,I do at times feel like a failure because I have not been able to conceive a child with him. He has been so supportive in the fact that I have not been able to, and feels that my son from previous marriage is sufficient for him.

    What is sad is that my friends are having children all the time and I feel so sad that I have not been able to grant my husband this simple joy of life. Sekarang, having read this article I feel so inspired. Allaah does send small and big blessings everyday. I feel the pain of not being able to have a child leave my soul.

    I am sure my husband will feel so relieved because he told me the other day, ‘I hate to see you so sad about this. Having a child or not having a child will never effect the way I feel about our marriage.I do feel blessed in someways that I do have a caring husband, alhamdulillaah. Now I feel more blessed that because of this reminder I do not have to feel like a failure for not having a child. Thank you again. Semoga Allah (swt) reward you for all your good efforts in sharing knowledge feesabilAllaah. amin!

    feeimanAllaah.

    UmmYahya

  12. Jazakhallahu khaira sister. To all the sisters( i inclusive) asking Allah for children. May Allah grant us righteous children. amin.

  13. My husband did hurt me by saying today that I cannot have children because of my black heart. This his not the first time he said stuff like this to me. He asked to marry me after him having another wife and two kids with her.

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