Why Women Get Played (Be Wanted, Not Needed)

For many years, I have helped many people resolve issues in their lives. A lot of the issues I have helped address, have been relationship issues. Many of them pertaining women and how they have been treated by men. A lot of them seem to be left in a state of confusion with “men” who attempt to take the role of men, only ending up to be boys. Women who are easily swayed by words are usually the ones getting left and abused by these so called “men.” Saying all the right types of words they want to hear. I will explain below, as best as I can to address this issue and why women, nice women, get treated like dirt. Inshallah

The issue always begin with the woman always choosing and chasing the wrong type of guy. Every time I have talked to a woman, they usually end up with a douche bag, who has no idea how to treat his woman. They are easily swayed by words and this itself creates the problem in the first place. Words are manipulative and they are usually meaningless, unless there is a right intention behind it, which usually isn’t in this case.

It leads them down a dark road, which seems bright, with an imagination filled with love and romance. Which they believe is love and romance, which is nothing but an easy score for the guy. They wear their heart on the sleeve and continue to play through this charade the guy has put up, while the woman, believing everything the guy says and does. It leads to heartache and heart break, with so much to lose because usually they begin to lose their trust towards men in the future.

abafazi nabo bayabathiya abayeni babo ukuba baphinde batshate kodwa kungenxa yokuba ayiseyonxalenye yendlela yokuphila yanamhlanje kwiindawo ezininzi kodwa ukuba abantu bayayiqhela njengomzekelo ukuba wonke umntu unomfazi ongaphezu komfazi ngoko akuyi kuba yinto enkulu ndicinga ukuba., words are manipulative and women are easily victim to these things. They continue to believe in this act of love and romance, which again, is nothing but their imagination coming into play. Women love to be loved and want to be loved. They want romance, well some do because it plays to their imagination which they have created for themselves. Most men easily understand these things because they know, a woman wants to be needed and they loved to be pampered. These things don’t come in the form of words now, they come in the form of gifts, which they believe is love now, is romance being portrayed.

Women will show they love their significant other, they will want attention in return because it’s what they believe is needed. It’s what women want, is the attention and the need to be loved because if they aren’t getting it in return, they feel torn apart because it is what they feel deserve. Amadoda, again take advantage of this, creating distance, creating separation and only creating a mental and trust issue in the long run. When creating distance between each other, the woman craves the man more and shows more affection towards him because she feels she isn’t loving him enough. So she does all sorts of things to get his attention. Some do whatever the man says, just because they believe they are in love and want the love in return.

This is definitely a wrong way to handle yourself because you aren’t benefiting from the situation. You are only giving into their demand and charade which they acted out quite carefully. Ekugqibeleni, the man ends up leaving because he got what he needed. Ngoku, the woman is left confused for many months. When it comes to men and women, women are not the type to get over a heart break easily. They will carry through this heart break for months. Not forgetting the things happening to them. They will drag themselves through the day and destroying relationships and friendships between those who are close them. It also destroys trust and love, for those who actually want to give it in return to them.

If only women were aware of these words and the actions that may come into play. If women only learned from their mistakes and did not destroy the trust lost between the past and the present. What happens in the past, should only be a lesson to be learned for the present and the future. Ndiyakholwa, women should definitely stand their ground when it comes to men and not give in so easily. Lay down the law and let men know that come into your life, if you aren’t marrying me, you aren’t having me in any shape, way or form.

Le ndlela, it lets the man know, what she actually wants from the relationship. Those who intend to stay, usually act out their words and not leave them as words. Let the boys play the games with the girls, who refuse to listen and only want to give a piece of action in return. Let the women, the strong, the powerful, the believing in love and real romance type, to find the ideal guy, who shows what she is worth.

Stop trying to be easy targets and stop trying to create unnecessary attention. It is what places you in these situations which leave you heart broken and seem think you were worthless. Love yourself before you seek to love others. Men love those types of strong, powerful, standing their ground type women. Intelligent women. Be wanted, not needed. Being wanted creates more of an attraction and being needed only puts you on the shelf where I know, you don’t want to belong.

Umtshato osulungekileyo

….Apho Ukuziqhelanisa Kwenziwa Kugqibelele

www.peacefulfamilies.org-Malik Shabazz – iziswe kuwe nguMtshato ococekileyo- www.purematrimony.com -Eyona nkonzo inkulu yehlabathi yoMtshato wokuQeqesha amaSilamsi.

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